#WINNING
I’m sure most of you are aware of this – but for those who aren’t, I’m a gambling affiliate. The majority of my income is made from basically getting people to play poker online or play at casinos online or bet sports online via my links. I then make a percentage of the rake, or from their losses dependent on whether it’s poker or casino.
On Friday, some of the biggest online poker rooms had their websites and various bank accounts seized by the Department of Justice. To quickly summarize, the likes of Full Tilt Poker and Pokerstars futures are unknown, and they have both had to say “goodbye” to all US players. I’ve got a lot of US players at those rooms, which make up a lot of my income. So it has the potential to really hurt me financially…
…yet I’m loving it.
Since I turned 30, I went into this “semi-retirement” mode where I basically did the bare minimum every day, and then not really much more. I know a lot of people were surprised that I was able to keep going that way considering in the past few years I’ve been a crazy goddamn workaholic.
Yet I’ve kept it up since January. The odd day I do work but I’ve basically been “slacking” the last few months. I’ve enjoyed it a lot of course – more time for family, for xbox, for reading, for just relaxing in the afternoon and taking a bath. It’s been nice being able to take my dog for a two hour walk and not worry about work for example.
All that is gone, because the motherfucking Scotsman is back.
I’ve been working overload the past two days just to make sure I have everything in track and all my ducks in a row, and doing what I can to take advantage of this situation. Everything is going motherfucking swimmingly, and this whole thing may end up being a blessing in disguise.
The workaholic Scotsman is back. And this time he’s better than ever, with his veins pumping full of tigerblood, as he proudly sits here as the owner of a “Big Poppa Pump” t-shirt.
Miss me?
#WINNING.
Alpha Protocol IS Very Good
Taff did an article on his blog entitled Homefront Isn’t Very Good which saved me from rushing out and purchasing it – so I decided to respond in kind by writing about Alpha Protocol. Except my job is to persuade him and others to buy it, as it’s one of the best video games I’ve ever played.
Alpha Protocol is a game that has a LOT of critics….and I’m not really sure why. I’ve never read much on the critics, but I’ve been told from others that it’s disliked by a lot of people – which just blows my mind.
You’ve heard before about games where “you play it how you want it” but most of them don’t do a very good job at that at all – the decisions you make are either small and don’t really impact the game much, or are laid out in front of you as clear cut decisions. Don’t kill a guy in Fallout and all it will mean is that other factions may like or not like you as much, and you’ll get a different ending slide. Even the end game of Fallout New Vegas is so clear cut: basically you have a choice of 4 endings, and it’s very clear cut and dry how to select each one.
Alpha Protocol is a much more natural game – even the smallest decisions affect the game outcome. A large part of the game is conversations with other people where how you interact with them changes so much about the game. All conversations are handled like real conversations too – as soon as the person is finished saying something to you, you have maybe a second to choose how to respond which is really neat, so keeps you on the ball.
Alpha Protocol is so good that immediately after finishing it, I immediately started a new game. I probably haven’t done that since the days of the ZX Spectrum. This playthrough I am going to do completely opposite decisions from my previous game, to see how everything plays out.
What’s great is you can play the game however you want. Want to be a Splinter Cell like spy, sneaking around and never getting detected? Go for it. Want to be Hobo with a Shotgun with messy hair and a lumberjack beard, walking around in street clothes and shooting the shit outta people? You can do that! Want to be a Jack Reacher like hero, who beats the utter shit out of people with his hands? Also an option. The game is set up to accommodate all playing styles and it also changes the story of the game.
It’s just such a ridiculously fun game, and I can only give it the highest compliments: it reminds me of the Syphon Filter series. That may not mean much, but to me it means a lot. Pre-XBox 360 and achievements, I very rarely played video games. I never beat them at any rate. I owned over 200 Playstation games and over 100 Playstation 2 games and over 60 Dreamcast games. Of all those, I beat GTA 4 once and Metal Gear Solid once. Never did finish the other GTA Games, or Metal Gear Solid 2. Yet the Syphon Filter Series – I beat all 3 of them, and I beat Syphon Filter three or four times, and Syphon Filter 2 at least twice.
I’m kinda curious about the negativity Alpha Protocol receives so I’ve decided to look around the net and see some of the complaints:
The stealth in it is a joke, everyone sees you all the time
Um….no. I was wearing street clothes and just had 2 slots out of 20 of my stealth attributes filled, yet I was able to sneak around all Sam Fisher like. It’s called being good at a game you retards.
The enemy AI was awful, could walk within 2 feet of them and they wouldn’t see you
Ah the polar opposite of the last complaint. I never had this issue at all. If I wasn’t careful with the stealth they’d detect me, simple as that.
The cover system sucks
I guess it was a Gears of War style system – honestly I didn’t use the actual cover system in the game much so I can’t really say. I hid in cover and all that but it was mainly by crouching down behind walls, hit hitting “A” to latch onto them.
The melee system is glitchy and has collision detection problems
I beat up over 100 guys and I didn’t find this once. And I was doing running knees and all that shit.
The levels are predictable and repetitive
What the hell? There’s a solid variety of levels, and so many different ways to go about each level. Need to get into that building? Use a zipline, use a diversion, sneak in etc.
Braykov(one of the level bosses) is broken and impossible to beat
Um yeah….if you’re doing it wrong. I was having problems with him too and I looked at strategies to beat him and they’re ALL WRONG. If you don’t want spoilers on how to beat him skip to the next paragraph. Anyway you let him run around and chase you when he comes down from the balcony, and the second he stops running and takes a breather before going up on the balcony – THAT’S when you attack him. Easy peasy.
The accuracy in this game is pitiful, it’s like your character is blind
Ha, what? If anything it’s the complete opposite of this when I can hit someone with my shotgun from 20 feet away(only when it’s lined up for a critical hit). People are seriously idiots – they think this is a run and gun shooter or something like Call of Duty. The gun physics are a bit more realistic and you need to focus more on lining up your shot is all – and even then not once you get your skills up.
This one kills me:
As Thorton progresses through the levels, there’s a skill set tree that you can upgrade. The player can choose to upgrade Thorton’s ability with specific weapons, martial arts training, general stats and stealth ability. Adding abilities helps with the poor stealth detention on the AI, but it seems like a secret agent should already have those skills.
Jesus this is retarded. First of all it’s a goddamn video game. Second of all if you choose a class like soldier, you do start off with the abilities. Third of all if you choose recruit there’s a back story as to WHY you don’t have these abilities yet.
Honestly I thought there would be some valid complaints, but instead it just reminded me why I never trust reviews of games, or the general publics opinion on anything. Idiots.
Land of Make Believe
Driving my wife so nuts at the moment, it’s great. Not sure why but I am just 100% addicted to the song Land of Make Believe, cover by Bucks Fizz:
It’s my ringtone, my alarm clock(twice – dual alarms), and then I play it at least 3-4 times during the day. I dunno what it is but I just find it such a great song – such a happy tune, such a getting psyched tune too.
RIP John Grisham
No John Grisham isn’t dead – but he might as well be.
Years and years ago, a John Grisham novel was what really got me into reading. At that point all I read was Enid Blyton books and Archie comics.
I remember my dad giving me Grishams “The Client” to read, and I absolutely loved it. I remember then going to the movies to watch the movie based on the book the same day I finished reading it. I remember really fond memories of that day, as it was the first time I’d read a book then seen it on the big screen in action.
I quickly read every other John Grisham novel, and became a huge fan of his. I could actually tell you where I read each book for the first time. The Firm, for example. I remember reading that book on a Saturday evening while eating Chips & Curry Sauce. I stayed up all night till 8am to finish it. I went to sleep, then woke up around 5pm and went to the Abronhill Shopping Center, where I rented the movie, and also bought myself more Chips & Curry Sauce.
I go back and read that book at least once a year, and every time I get a huge craving for chips & curry sauce.
Unfortunately, John Grishams books have changed recently. Gone are the “thriller” parts to them, or stories that you can really relate to, or just can’t stop reading. Now every Grisham book quite honestly is a chore to get to.
His last good book was The King of Torts, which ironically was probably his best book. Just an amazing story that went at such a rapid pace.
Since then, things have gone downhill yet I have continued to purchase them and read them.
Bleachers: Just terrible.
The Last Juror: Average at best. Very bland for the most part.
The Broker: I don’t remember this one too well so will have to go back and read it. But one thing the early Grisham novels were – was memorable.
Playing for Pizza: Lame.
The Appeal: Nauseating as all hell. It felt like Grisham had a political opinion to tell and decided to write a book about it.
The Associate: NOTHING FUCKING HAPPENED IN THIS. It just keeps building and then just fizzles out.
Finally, The Confession. I bought this on the day it came out, and started it a few days ago. I had to push myself through to the end. It was just dull as dishwater, and yet another book where you felt it was just propaganda for Grishams opinion on something. Just a boring boring book, all the characters are bland.
So with that, it’s time to take John Grisham off my “must buy” author list. Sorry John – but you’ve lost it.
For those curious, here’s my “must-buy” list – where I will have novels pre-ordered the second they are announced from any of these authors:
- Joseph Finder
- Lee Child
- Linwood Barclay
- Vince Flynn
- Irvine Welsh
- James Patterson(Womens Murder Club, Alex Cross only)
I’ve got a list of new authors to try, and I am going to start with Ben Coes, a new author highly recommended by Vince Flynn. His book is Power Down.
Also I convinced my wife to start reading Joseph Finder. She was finding Company Man slow for awhile then absolutely fucking loved it. Seriously Finder is the man and his stories are amazing. I just hope the creation of a repeating character like Nick Heller doesn’t hurt his future books, but I think it might.
Movied I Watched In February
Yet another “Christ where does the time go” post. Just been doing work, playing xbox, spending time with the family and relaxing. Not too much going on but I will try and actually write something!
TV shows I am going through right now is Becker and X-Files.
In the meantime here’s movies that I watched in February:
Saw 3: fucking amazing. Awesome story about the person that had to do the puzzles, yet it was a backdrop to the main story about jigsaw et al. Wrapped up a lot of stuff in the prev two, and was just really fucking good. ***1/2
So good it may make the prev two better on rewatch. As it is, hit blockbuster right after for saw 4 and 5, as well as saw 2 on xbox 360
Just Go With It: Very funny movie. Also holy shit is Brooklyn Decker smokin’. Story wise you’d what you’d expect, but it is very funny and very well done, paced well etc. Nick Swordson is also fucking amazing in it. ****
There was some weird guy in the theatre that every time he had to go, would announce it loudly to people. He’d say “I have to go to the washroom” then go – then he’d come back and be like “I’m back from the washroom”. Out of nowhere with about 15 minutes left he said “I have to go for a smoke!” then he never came back. Rather amusing.
The film itself probably didn’t even need the whole faith healer stuff, and I kinda disconnected every time it happened, which is a pity as this was a fantastic movie other than all that. Some phenomenal performances from everyone involved, including of course Michael Clarke Duncan. Jesus he was exceptional in this.
Also David Morse never fails to impress me. Just a solid fucking actor. ****
I’ve never seen the theatrical edition, and there’s actually a warning at the start of this: “don’t watch it because it sucks compared to the theatrical edition. It’s a bunch of additional shit, plus lots of tits and big, black cock“. I’ve had this movie sitting on my hard drive for over a year, so said fuck it and decided to just go with it anyway.
The unrated edition basically included the following:
– Every 20 or 30 minutes, a still image of a big black cock will appear on screen for about 10 seconds.
– Naked women walking in FRONT of the movie at random intervals.
– Fart noises every time someone bends over.
I’m not sure if it’s retarded or brilliant.
Anyway despite their warnings that it’d suck it was actually a funny movie. Recommended. ****
Sanctum: Lame. First movie I saw in 3D. 3D was not necessary for this movie. Really felt like they read the script, and thought “Hmm this is lame, let’s add in 3D to distract people”. Might have actually been good with REAL actors, but when your lead actor has been nominated for Razzies and Worst Supporting Actors…yeah. Also I hope Rhys Wakefield never gets another job ever – he was so bad. The whole movie was based around emotion and getting into the characters, and when you have a bunch of people who can’t act…..yeah. *1/2
It really is just The Karate Kid redone – if you lined the movies up side by side the main parts of the storyline would be exactly the same throughout the whole viewing. You basically spend the whole movie saying to yourself “The original one did this better” and “the original one did that better”.
It really seemed to be missing the awesomeness of the original Karate Kid – there’s a word I just can’t think of to really explain it, but it just didn’t have that special something that the original Karate Kid did. Like Chan was no Miyagi for instance, Negro Boy was no DANIEL-SAN. Plus oh my god the crane kick in this was SO FUCKING GAY.
However there is an AWESOME scene early in the movie, where it’s Jackie Chan vs 8 Schoolboys. This scene is awesome because Chan doesn’t actually beat up the kids – he basically grabs one kid and uses HIM to beat up the other kids and so in. Quite a neat scene.
Probs about ** I guess. Mason was into it – can’t wait to introduce him to the real fucking thing.
Also zach g can be super fucking annoying and unlikeable at times, and he was like that for the majority of this movie. **